Ergens zin in????

Zet hier neer waar je nu zin in heb

dit topic te sluiten

helemaal met hardstyler eens


game set and match

Ik heb zin in: gebraden eendenborst met cranberries

Girl: Hi
GodFather: hello
GodFather: who is this?
Girl: just a someone?
GodFather: A someone I know?
Girl: nope
GodFather: Then why the hell are you bothering me?
Girl: well sorrrrrry
Girl: I just wanted to chat with you
GodFather: why?
Girl: nevermind your an asshole
GodFather: Hey wait a minute
Girl: yes?
GodFather: look I'm sorry. I'm just a little paranoid
Girl: paranoid?
GodFather: yes
Girl: of what?
Girl: me?
GodFather: No. I'm in hiding.
Girl: LOL
GodFather: Don't fucking laugh at me!
GodFather: This shit is serious!
Girl: What are you hiding from?
GodFather: The cops.
Girl: gimme a fucking break
GodFather: I'm serious.
Girl: I don't get it
GodFather: The cops are after me.
Girl: For what?
GodFather: I'm wanted in three states
Girl: For???
GodFather: It's kindof embarrasing.
GodFather: I had sex with a turkey.
GodFather: Hello?
Girl: You are fucking sick.
GodFather: Send me your picture.
Girl: why?
GodFather: so I know you aren't one of them.
Girl: One of what?
GodFather: The cops.
Girl: I'm not a cop i told you
GodFather: Then send me your picture.
Girl: hold on
GodFather: Hurry up.
GodFather: Are you there?
GodFather: fuck you, cop!
Girl: Hey sorry
Girl: I had to do something for my mom.
GodFather: I thought you were trying to find a picture to send to me.
GodFather: When really you were notifying the authorities.
GodFather: Weren't you!?
Girl: thats not it
GodFather: Then what?
Girl: I don't want to send you the picture cause I'm not pretty
GodFather: Most cops aren't
Girl: IM NOT A FUCKING COP YOU DICKHEAD!
GodFather: Then send me the picture.
Girl: fine. What's your e-mail?
GodFather: Just send it through here.
Girl: alright *PIC*
Girl: Did you get it?
GodFather: Hold on. I'm looking.
GodFather: That was me back in may
Girl: I've lost weight since then.
GodFather: I hope so
Girl: what?!?
Girl: that hurt my feelings.
GodFather: Did it?
Girl: Yes. I'm not that much smaller than that now.
GodFather: Will it make you feel better if I send you my picture?
Girl: yes
GodFather: Alright let me find it.
Girl: kks
GodFather: Okay here it is. *PIC*
Girl: this isn't you.
GodFather: I'll be damned if it ain't!
Girl: You don't look like that.
GodFather: How the hell do you know?
Girl: cause your profile has another picture.
GodFather: The profile pic is a fake.
GodFather: I use it to hide from the cops.
Girl: You look like the Farm Fresh guy lol
GodFather: Well, you look like you ATE the Farm Fresh guy....
GodFather: Not to mention all the groceries.
Girl: Go fuck yourself
GodFather: I was going to until I saw that picture
GodFather: Now my dick won't get hard for a week.
Girl: I shouldn't have sent you that picture.
Girl: You've done nothing but slam me.
Girl: you hurt me.
GodFather: And calling me the Farm Fresh guy doesn't hurt me?
Girl: I thought you were bullshitting me!
GodFather: Why would I do that?
Girl: I can't believe that cops are after you
GodFather: I can't believe Santa lets you sit on his lap..
Girl: FUC YOU!!!
GodFather: You'd break both of his legs.
Girl: You're a FUCKing asshole.
Girl: I've been teased my whole life because of my weight
Girl: and you make fun of me when you don't even know me
GodFather: Ok. I'm sorry.
Girl: No you aren't
GodFather: You're right. I'm not.
GodFather: HAARRRRR!
Girl: I'm done with you
GodFather: Aww. I'm sorry.
Girl: I'm putting you on ignore
GodFather: Wait a sec
GodFather: We got off on the wrong foot.
GodFather: Wanna start over?
Girl: No
GodFather: I'll eat your pussy
Girl: You'll what?
GodFather: You heard me.
GodFather: I said I'd eat your pussy.
Girl: I thought you said you couldn't get it hard after seeing my picture
GodFather: Do I need a hard-on to eat your pussy?
Girl: I'd like to know that the man eating me out is excited yes
GodFather: Well I'm not like most men.
GodFather: I get excited in different ways.
Girl: Like what?
GodFather: Do you really wanna know?
Girl: I don't know
GodFather: You have to tell me yes or no.
Girl: I'm afraid to
GodFather: Why?
Girl: cause
GodFather: cause why?
Girl: well lets see
Girl: you say you have sex with turkeys. You call me fat. then you wanna eat me out
Girl: doesn't that seem strange to you?
GodFather: Nope
Girl: well its strange to me
GodFather: Fine. I won't do it if you don't want me to
Girl: I didn't say that
GodFather: So is that a yes?
Girl: I guess so.
GodFather: Ok. I need your help getting excited though.
GodFather: Are you willing?
Girl: What do you need me to do?
GodFather: I need you talk like a pirate.
Girl: ???
GodFather: When I start to go limp... you say "HARRRR!!!"
GodFather: ok?
GodFather: Hello?
Girl: You can't be serious
GodFather: Oh yes I am!
GodFather: It's my fantasy.
Girl: this is retarded
GodFather: Do you want it or not?
Girl: Yes I want it.
GodFather: Then you'll do it for me?
Girl: sure
GodFather: Ok. Here we go.
GodFather: I gently remove your panties and being to massage your thighs.
GodFather: You get really juicy thinking about my tounge brushing up against them
GodFather: I softly begin to tounge your wet pussy.
GodFather: I run my tounge up and down your smooth slit.
Girl: mmmm yeah
GodFather: uh oh ...going limp.
Girl: Har
GodFather: You gotta do better than that!
GodFather: Your picture was really bad.
Girl: HARRRRRRRRRRRR
GodFather: Ahhhh. Much better. I feel your pussy get more moist with every stroke.
GodFather: I softly suck on your clit bringing it in and out of my mouth.
GodFather: Your juices run down my chin as your scent makes its way to my nose.
GodFather: I begin to feel empowered by your femininity.
Girl: mmmmmm you are good
GodFather: I feel your thighs tighten as I suck harder
GodFather: going limp
Girl: HARRRRRRR
GodFather: Mmmm I grab your swelling buttocks in my hands.
GodFather: You begin to sway back and forth.
GodFather: going limp
Girl: this is stupid
GodFather: ...still limp
GodFather: Do it!
Girl: HARRRRRRRRRRRRR
GodFather: I turn you around to lick your asshole.
GodFather: I pry apart that battleship you call your ass.
GodFather: I see shit nuggets hanging from the hair around your asshole.
Girl: WTF?!?!?
GodFather: They stink really bad.
Girl: OMG STOP!!!
GodFather: I start to get fed up with your ugly ass
GodFather: I tear off your wooden peg leg.
GodFather: I ram it up your ass.
Girl: YOURE A FUCKING PYSCHO!!
GodFather: Then I pour hot carmel over your head.
GodFather: And turn you into a fucking candy apple...
GodFather: I kick you in the face!
Girl: FUCK YOU ASSHOLE!!
GodFather: The celluloid from your cheeks hits the side of the cabin...
GodFather: Your parrot flys away.
GodFather: ...going limp again.
GodFather: Hello?
GodFather: Say it!
GodFather: HAARRRRRR!!!!!